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how to become friends again with someone who hates you

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No matter how hard you try to please everybody there will always be somebody who is jealous of your success or popularity. Learn more... You’re never going to be able to get everyone in the world to like you. What's up?". You'll find plenty of other friends who aren't so cruel. HuffPost is part of Verizon Media.

In fact, doing so can often encourage your friend to open up as well. To enable Verizon Media and our partners to process your personal data select 'I agree', or select 'Manage settings' for more information and to manage your choices. Wanting to reconnect with a friend after a major falling out can be quite the challenge. It's nothing personal. If they start getting mad tell them you will come back when they relax and when they feel comfortable talking to you.Tell them how you feel but don't complain about their actions. In order for a meaningful friendship to happen, you have to do things outside of where you first met. I accept your apology, but it might take a while for me to get over it.". If someone is going to go out of their way to bring you down, don't do the same to them. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. It's not unusual for new friendships to depend on the initiative of the person that really wants the friendship the most. We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. If you want to become friends again with someone you told you like, wait a few weeks until you’ve gotten over your feelings for them. Change bad habits and poor grooming by all means, and work on bettering your natural character traits, but don't try to smother your real personality just because you're trying to fit in. or "Did you have a good weekend?" wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. If you sense that the things you're sharing are making people quiet, then back off until you get to know them better. % of people told us that this article helped them. What do you like to do in your free time. Be positive and show them the good things about yourself - traits that make that person want to be around you more. Logic would tell you that when you suggest a lunch, your friend should take turns and do it the next time, but in the beginning, that probably won't happen.

Every day at wikiHow, we work hard to give you access to instructions and information that will help you live a better life, whether it's keeping you safer, healthier, or improving your well-being. Hello Giggles is part of the Meredith Beauty Group. They might say that they "just don't like you". For example, you can go back to a coffee place that you always used to go to together. I'm usually pretty forgiving. This article has been viewed 712,356 times. Getty Images, 7 Hacks for Rebooting a Friendship After a Major Falling Out. and humiliated you? Trying to impress them may even seem like you're showing off or trying to get something out of them. wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. Friends start out at different levels. Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 55,407 times.

That’s why pointing out something you have in common is a great way to approach someone you want to be friends with. They might question why you want them to like you or be your friend, especially if you have a past with the other person. Tell me about your family. Although I’m not completely sure if “reconnecting” is what I want out of it, holding a grudge forever isn’t going to make my life any better. Don't try too hard to impress the other person. Don't obsess over one person not liking you. You have to share tidbits about your life as well. They express negativity towards you … As licensed professional counselor Kailee Place tells HelloGiggles, it’s important to take that first step no matter how scary it may be. If you really want to reconnect and repair your friendship, it’s important to acknowledge your mistakes. With some people, we might remain casual friends for a long time, and with others we have the opportunity to become closer. The thing is, I already have. By using our site, you agree to our. So lately, I’ve been thinking about whether reaching out to talk and clear the air would be a good idea or not. Apologize and accept that you may have been wrong too. If you only see each other casually (for things like your kid's baseball games or the monthly book club), you won't bond as close friends. As time goes on, your friendship will fall on more even footing, but at first you'll need to put in more effort. You, on the other hand, have the goal of making new friends (or specifically, this one particular friendship) on the forefront of your mind. I’m speaking from experience. What did they do?

Don't get discouraged. Paul Chernyak is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Chicago. Be polite. Don’t feel like you have to rush to get the relationship back to where it was before the betrayal. I'm sorry for yelling at you and calling you names.". Find shared interests. Be careful what you say to them or accuse them of. If someone is so invested in disliking you, then they likely have other things going on in their life that have made them so angry and upset.

However, sometimes you can be put in a situation where someone you really need or want to get along with just doesn’t like you for whatever reason. You can say something like, "I don't agree what you did, but I can see how you would make that mistake. Beyond that, it can possibly lead to an even bigger fight. I'm working on being a better person, and not doing ________." Around my birthday, I started to think about my life (as many of us tend to do) and decided I wanted to bring more positivity into it over the next year.

Ask questions about them instead of talking about you. Are there other possible outcomes? If they're going to screw it up intentionally, then forget them. You can say something like, "I've forgiven you for what you did, but you can't do it again. Try writing down what happened and why it was so upsetting to you. But people love to talk about themselves. Although it's hard and it takes time, if you forgive them, work to rebuild the friendship, and take the right steps to set boundaries, becoming friends again with someone who betrayed you is … This article was co-authored by Paul Chernyak, LPC. Take it slow and let the friendship naturally deepen without any expectations or pressure.”. However, you might find yourself in a situation where you want to remain friends with the person who betrayed you. If you have a hard time shifting to something positive, then try taking a moment to evaluate your thoughts.

Try to find out what type of person he/she really is. As Nicole Zangara, author of Surviving Female Friendships: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, explains. It's important that you really listen during the early stages of friendship, and not just rattle off questions one by one as a way to make conversation. Don't always stare and, in a way, ignore a little. http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0005796709002848, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/rebecca-bent/how-to-fix-a-friendship_b_798477.html, http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/surviving_betrayal, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mindful-anger/201409/how-do-you-forgive-even-when-it-feels-impossible-part-1, http://downloads.bbc.co.uk/headroom/cbt/catch_it.pdf, https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/EmpathyatWork.htm, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/is-psychology-making-us-sick/201310/building-repairing-trust-keys-sustainable-relationship, http://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-to-mend-a-broken-friendship-even-if-youre-not-on-speaking-terms/, http://psychcentral.com/lib/10-way-to-build-and-preserve-better-boundaries/, http://www.dartmouth.edu/~healthed/relax/, http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/relationships/betrayal-5-steps-to-help-you-move-forward/#.V-GTgPArLcc, consider supporting our work with a contribution to wikiHow, You can say something like, "I felt betrayed and felt like you didn't care about my feelings or well-being. If you decide to give your friendship another go, be patient. Avoid shaming or humiliating the person during the conversation. I was just giving constructive criticism on your work", go with, "I understand what you mean. It really put me in a negative space and made me feel like I didn't want to be your friend anymore.". Just don't talk to them. How do I avoid someone who is in most of my classes? However, if they respond with anger or indifference, just walk away and spend your time and energy on someone who does like you.

All people are different and just because one friend betrayed you does not mean that other friends will. Offers may be subject to change without notice. Ask and find out if they really hate you and why they hate you. Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address, Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps. Hang out with your other friends more often. The Friend Who Makes You … Truer words have never been spoken. For more advice, including how to get to the bottom of why the other person hates you, keep reading. While you might not be able to get your friendship back to its old glory, it is possible to mend fences and get your old friend to like you again. To get someone who hates you to like you, try engaging them in regular conversations to show that you care and want to become better friends. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/a2\/Get-Someone-Who-Hates-You-to-Like-You-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-Get-Someone-Who-Hates-You-to-Like-You-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/a2\/Get-Someone-Who-Hates-You-to-Like-You-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/aid288016-v4-728px-Get-Someone-Who-Hates-You-to-Like-You-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":"728","bigHeight":"546","licensing":"

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